Paying a little forward...

Ya know, there are very few times in the world you see selfless actions..really...completely selfless...now I don't mean when your friends come thru for you cuz if anyone is going to, you would suspect it would be the people who care deeply for you...I've written about many people who have been there for us and how much it's touched my heart and how much, I feel, it aids in my recovery by knowing there's so much love in my life...this is a story about another kind of person...someone who does something for you, benefiting absolutely nothing for themselves other than feeling good about doing it, and doesn't even know you from Adam (whoever Adam is, lol)...there is a girl named Rachel who has volunteered to wash cars at the car wash a local sports radio show is doing for me (Barley & Hops Show, yay!!)...I've never met her...heck, I can't even find her on Facebook to 'friend' her to tell her thanks, but she's volunteered to stand in the 100 degree Florida heat in August in a bikini (and dang, can she wear one from the pics I've seen) and wash cars to raise money for my family she's never met. I'm overwhelmed at stories like this...it motivates me even more to work harder in making waves for causes I believe in for people I don't know.
Now here's where I get to pay it forward...I was made aware by a FB posting that she's in a modeling contest to be in a hair commercial. Now, I know you're thinkin' 'here's what she's getting out of this' but that couldn't be further from the truth cuz I picked it up from a friend's post (like I said, I can't find her on FB so this didn't come from her personally) & she has no idea that I've decided to take up this cause for her....there are 500 contestants and they are rewarding a commercial to the top 5 girls...I thought what a wonderful thank you I could give her if I could get her up there with her votes...honestly, I don't care if she knows that I'm doing this cuz I think the more important aspect of her winning is the fact that so many actors & models have such a skewed vision of the world and charity & only do things to 'get their name out there' and there is nothing in it for her to wash cars in a local bar parking lot for a few hours but a sunburn and heat exhaustion...I think this world might be a better place if people who aspire to be in the position of the 'beautiful world' of the global entertainment industry had values like this girl. She is a real role model for our little girls...so I ask of you this...click on the link below on it takes you right to her page with a red 'vote' button to click on...there is no cost, no signing up, no future spam, just two clicks in 5 seconds and you can help me thank her for doing such a generous and wonderful thing for me, click it once a day thruout the month of August....who knows, you might need someone like her to do something like this for you one day...I never thought I would!!
THANKS SOOOOOO MUCH!!!

Click here to help me for Rachel!! 

And the beat goes on...

Well, I've made it through the icky window...by Monday after my treatments, the worst is usually behind me. The next meds do cause aches like you worked out the hardest you ever have in your life and your muscles ache coupled with an arthritis feeling in your joints. Tylenol 3 has been my best friend and I'm acetaminophen free today! The best side effect that is gone from these treatments are those harsh mouth pains...I only had a dullness of my taste buds this time and THAT I can live with. The oncologist says 2 more of these and we'll do another PET. I guess it's normal but everytime we start talking about PET scans, my nerves go to overdrive...it's like you want to know what's going on in your body but while you're between scans you can pretend everything is just fine.

Posters of the upcoming events!

 

Barley & Hops Show

 

Benefit for the Susan G Komen Foundation

Sunshiny days to come...

I have some of the most wonderful people in my life!! I've expressed love for my family & friends that have helped us out along the way but I wanted a chance to extend that story a bit...
first, we have a local sports show here in town and the guys & gal that do it are friends of mine from way back...they have decided to have a car wash (calling it Bubbles for Boobies, how cute!!) in my honor next month. Now we're not paupers or anything & hubby has a nice new job but in the interim of getting acclimated in it, our bills are more than tight with all the additional medical stuff from my cancer. These guys have come to the rescue right in the nick of time and have so generously donated their time & efforts for me & my family. We couldn't be more touched! Many of my friends have been posting and passing the word for this event...it's been heartwarming to say the least and have really lifted my spirits to see how many people care about us! It's been a wonderful addition to my treatments to have these people hold me up as well lessen the financial burden on us a bit...very healing to the soul, thus the body!!
Another wonderful thing that I mentioned before is the benefit that's being thrown in August. I have been bestowed the very special position of honorary member of a team that's walking the Komen 3 Day for the Cure in October by a very special lady that I actually just met in person last week. We have a mutual friend that told her my story and she just took it to heart. She asked me to participate in this fundraiser for the Komen Foundation as the emcee, as well as to share my story to help raise awareness for Komen. We're having food, drinks, a couple of fantastic bands stocked with musicians that have been friends of mine for years. These guys have donated their time and energy to many benefits I've thrown over my years in the bar biz and now are doing it for my cause...I'm so lucky to have such talented and generous friends! I am sooooo looking forward to actually be able to put it out there in person for people and to help them understand that just a little bit goes a long way in aiding the fight for life!! If you actually live in the area of Lakeland, Florida, hit me up with an email for advanced tickets to this event cuz it's gonna be a blast!

The weirdest things...

For the last couple of weeks, my big toes (toenails in particular) have ached like someone hit them with a hammer...at first I thought I had ingrown something or anothers but then I noticed it was across the whole nail bed when I pressed on them...they were, & still are very painful...I was worried I picked up some kind of fungus but didn't have a clue where it would of came from. I decided not to do anything until I saw my doctor which was today. He informed me that it was a side effect of the chemo. They had told me in the beginning that the meds could cause my nails to get brittle but that never happened. He said lots of people complain of sore toenails...interesting...my hair fell out in two weeks but it took my toenails 19 weeks to care...lol...
I had my first of at least 3 maintenance chemo treatments today. I've been on 4 and 5 meds that took about 2-1/2 hours to put in me. Today I only took one and it took 4 hours to drip through....crazy stuff...I'd of asked why but I was taking my nap and was happy that it was a bit extended now...one must have their priorities straight...LOL...anyway, the side effects from this is pain not nausea...since I've had little side effects thus far, my doctor says I may not have any more pain than I have had and that the effects should come in the same time frame as the last 7 so I should be good by next week if I have any problems at all. I'm feeling good thus far and haven't even taken any Motrin today...I do have Tylenol 3 and Percocet on back up though just in case.

Looking back and looking ahead...

Yep, so we did go out to hear our friends Saturday night & I did go without a wrap on my head...it was okay, not toooo many stares but, man oh man, if one more person rubs my head I'm gonna start swingin'! Why do people feel like they can touch you like that...I mean, when you hug someone or shake their hand, it gives them an opportunity to extend their arms to condone the action, but for someone to just come up and start rubbing a part of your body, c'mon....keeps you're hands to yourself unless you ask...The other thing that got on my last nerve were the stories...I mean, don't get me wrong, I want to be an inspiration and have no problem discussing cancer with someone and hearing their victory stories about themselves or someone they love, but why people think I want OR NEED to hear their story about someone who died of breast cancer at an early age while I'm obviously out to enjoy myself is beyond me...and not just one person but FIVE...I guess maybe I'm the crazy one & this is normal if so many people think that it's beneficial for me to hear this while I'm trying to socialize & relax...maybe I'm being too sensitive but I'M the one that is fighting cancer so please find a sensitivity chip when encountering me in a social atmosphere...this is not to discourage anyone from telling me stories on here or via e-mail, it's just I have created these platforms for just such things and it's in these venues that I prepare myself to deal with heavy emotions...not in a bar with a rock band on stage!
Tomorrow is my first of 3 maintenance chemo sessions...I'm pretty on edge about this one. The nurse told me that these meds have no nausea side effects but they do come with double the pain of the last 7...fabulous! We're all just hoping that my body relates to these as well as the last and my side effects are minimal. I hafta take 5 steroid pills tonite...lol...if loss of appetite and weight are signs of cancer, I must be cured cuz the dang little pills are keeping my head stuck in the fridge and I've gained about 25-30 pounds in the last 6 months! I'll let you guys know how it goes later on in the week...keep sayin' your prayers for me, PLEASE!

TOPLESS!

So I took the baby & went over to my Dad's today. I picked up my bandanna as I was walking out our door & decided that I was pretty tired of wrapping things around my head so I tossed it in the diaper bag & set off. I stopped at the store & wandered in & got a few glances, but nothing more than I would probably do if I saw a bald chick. I went on to my Dad's & we decided to take the baby to visit Grandma at work (she works at a bank), have lunch, & do some shopping. I asked him if he'd feel uncomfortable with me going without my bandanna since I had a bit of hair now...God bless him, he told me he'd of been comfortable with me out when I didn't have one hair on my head...so off we went...it's funny cuz I thought that I'd be a bit self conscientious but as we went thru our day, I completely forgot what I looked like...okay, except for when we wandered thru Walmart & one little boy, about 11, stared at me...then I remembered but only for a minute. When hubby got home from work tonight I told him about my topless journey. Much to my surprise he gave me a big ole high five!! He's told me all the way thru that he thought I was beautiful bald, but it's kinda his job to tell me that...LOL...the baby is spending the night with my Dad tomorrow night so that hubs & I can get out & catch some friends' band that's playing...hubby suggested I go tomorrow night without a wrap...hmmmm, I'm not sure if I've got the nerve for that yet, but we'll see...my confidence gets stronger by the day...stay tuned...

Happy anniversary to us!

Today is my 2nd wedding anniversary! It's funny cuz 'they' say that the first year of marriage is the hardest...yeah, whatever...that may be true for those who don't go thru finding out you're having a baby at 40 AND having cancer all in the second year...
Breast cancer is thought of so much as a 'chick' disease but it's ridiculous how much it affects so much more than just the patient...your spouse, kids, extended family, friends...the list goes on...my husband has been so much more than incredible in this crazy crisis...since day one he's been venomous in defending my health. I know that he was as scared as I was when he found out what we were facing...we'd only been married a year and a half and he was facing losing his wife and not knowing if his newborn son would have a Mom to raise him...his emotions were just as crazy, spastic, and raging as mine...but he kept it together...and not just kept it together, but wouldn't for one minute let ME not focus on the positives. He has stood strong thru soooo much adversity that added to the ridiculousness of our cancer journey as well...he is simply amazing! The mind has so much control over the body and I can't imagine if I didn't have him to keep me focused and uplifted, where my health might be and I truly credit him for helping to save my life! Adversity can kill a relationship if the partners can't come together and learn to fight the fight (whatever it may be) as a team and so many times couples get torn apart during those times...I am so truly blessed to have a man that wouldn't let me shut down, shut anyone out, or give up on myself...his strength has been part of my therapy! Though 2/3 of our kids are away right now and we don't have one extra penny for romantic dinners out or presents, when I kissed him goodbye this morning, I felt so fortunate to just have him in my life, to have and to hold, til death do us part, and becuz of him...I plan on that being a loooooong life!!

Hair raising II...

Just wanted to post a couple of pics showing my hair that's coming back in...it ain't much but it's more than I've had in a while!!

What the doctor DIDN'T order...

It's been a rough week mentally cuz like I posted last, I've felt weak. It scares ya that that may mean you're relapsing somehow....but today was just what the doctor didn't order cuz he doesn't treat my soul...
my hubby had told me about a friend of his at work who has a dear female friend that was just diagnosed. Hubby had gotten to witness to her about our situation and he came home that day so rejuvenated in our fight. Well, I got to speak to her today. I took the hubs lunch & met his friend, who in turn, called her. She was soooo sweet and so wonderful telling me how I was an inspiration to her...what she doesn't understand is how much SHE helped ME today. Sometimes I just want this all over and I lose sight of how much I must continue to fight and just how lucky I am to be where I am today. She was a reminder of that...the fight never ends and the spirit has so much control over the body...there is a purpose for everything and my progress doesn't just affect me and my family but the attitudes and progress of other people and their families that are in this fight that are following my journey...I left hub's work with a refreshed attitude and I dearly needed that!!! Thanks dear new friend!