If that Friday had only of been the 13th too!

So we came to the end of that week, just another one with my husband missing work between me being in too much pain to handle our baby and doctor's appointments, and long days of hoping the Percocet will help without complicating anything else in my body...Friday night was just like any other day of the week in our house anymore...until around 7pm when the phone rang...it was the breast specialist...she asked me how I was doing and let me go on about the pain and the swelling and finally in one of those 'calm doctor's concerned' voices, she informed me that she had sent the last session's fluid to the lab and it had come back being abnormal cancer cells...her words were very close to 'I still don't believe it cuz it doesn't look like cancer'...what?!?..was that suppose to mean that it might not be?!...I got out the question thru my stunned state of shock, 'well then, should I be worried or not?' It was met with 'I'm afraid you should be'...my head was spinning...didn't I ask about cancer the first time I met with her? Didn't they run tests for cancer with my family history from the very start? Didn't I repeatedly ask about this and was dismissed several times? What?! How?! Why?! I got off the phone with her as quickly as possible but not before she had told me to come in the next week so we could figure out our options...I agreed to get her off the phone so I could try to unfog my brain...
My husband had been standing there while I was talking very impatient to know what was being said on the other end...I couldn't speak for a moment but at least had the presence of mind to retreat to the bedroom quickly before one of our older two kids saw me completely fall apart...I recapped the doctor's end of the conversation for my husband and, I gotta tell ya, the next few minutes are still a fog in my mind. I know it involved tears but to tell ya the truth, it's still a blur....what to do next??? Dang, I wanted my Mom!!!